Feeling a bit pissed off with my paid work. In the end they are going to use some random person to act as ‘the artist’ for the handbag promotion. To be honest it could have been anyone handing out sheets of paper for people to fill in a bag design. Although I still think it would have been funny a bit tongue in cheek from my perspective. I find it a bit ridiculous how the brand try and associate with ‘the artist’ or rather ‘fake artist’. When they had the opportunity to use a real one, they didn’t. They just want someone to pose as one making an association with how creative the brand is. I then saw another opportunity at my other job at the arts centre, a vacancy that was not advertised internally and so now I have conveniently missed the deadline. Sometimes I feel like I am invisible at work and seen as someone who just does a bit of art with nothing else to offer. I know these jobs are not the ‘be all’ of my life however I still want to feel that I am progressing in all areas of my work. Reaching the grand old age of 36 last month is making me feel like I should be further on in my career and I worry that I will be continually overlooked.
It’s funny how when I am stressed with my paid work I start feeling more creative, not sure what that’s all about. Does creativity come out of stress? I have been thinking about working with my brother who has been researching our family tree. He is off to India on Saturday with my Mum to do further research as our family lived in India during the British Empire. Our ancestors are a mixture of British and immigrants from Portugal that were known as the Eurasians. I like the idea of working with a non-artist and thinking of creative ways of presenting our family tree. My relatives from my mums, mum side have a strong dark Portuguese look which I would like to try and mimic whilst my brother talks through his research in a performance lecture style piece. I also have a big idea for the arts centre to use the art gallery for a one off event near the end of a show. I would like to propose my idea to them although I do worry that I may be overlooked again. I have been trying to get this idea of the ground for about a year. The gallery at the arts centre is the perfect size for my activity and could really broaden their audience. If my event was successful it could be a regular activity or could be rolled out at other art galleries.
