I have recently visited the MA show at Wimbledon where I am going to start (in the sculpture area) in a few weeks. Their end of year show incorporates all specialisms (sculpture, drawing, VLP etc..) and so I was looking forward to seeing the diversity … whilst also hoping that some of my nerves about commencing would be eased !
As an anxious type of person in the first place, I thought that by seeing the show I would feel happier about my ability in relation to those currently completing the course. The work was definately varied across media and 'specialist boundaries' … work that fluxed between performance, video and sculpture was particuarly interesting. In this resepct, standing amongst the plethora of final works, where each person had been able to define an indvidual identity within their work, made me feel at ease. It is this 'crossing' and exploration (though some at the show were more ambitious than others) that I enjoy in my own practice. At least I felt I had made the right choice of college! After leaving the show i felt quite positive, but it wasnt long before the anxiety returned!
If I am not so worried about placing my work in the context of the institution, then why do I still feel anxious ? There is a level of 'normality' here i guess, in that, for anyone, a new situation brings about unsettling feelings. Despite being aware of this, it doesn't stop me from thinking … 'i just want to get that first critique/tutorial/presentation over with' !!! Confidence is key for anybody, particuarly artists, where it provides a driving force behind creativity i.e. not being frightened to subject yourself to the 'outside' or to taking on / challenging ideas. Whilst at the moment this situation makes me feel un-confident, I know that in 12 months time it will hopefully be a different story!
