(16th September post 2007 continued)
I suspect that if I could talk with these men, in discussion there might be many, many things in our worldview that we disagree on. The joy though in a way of NOT being able to get caught up in these differences is that I see more clearly to they're 'being ness' and find that I really like them. They are warm, kind, genuine people – very at odds with the stereotypical hunter I have imagined in the past.
I stand and watch some red squirrels playing on the lawn, we are in the grounds of a wealthy estate. Guido guides me as to what I can and cannot film as the grounds belong to "a man who is not here" so out of respect for his privacy he instructs me when to film and when not.
There are beautiful flowerbeds, ornamental trees, and lots of rose hips fat and juicy and Guido and me discuss making jam.
Later that weekend I meet a girlfriend whose mother was German. I tell her about my trip and she says yes she has seen this in her family, a strange mixture of masculine and feminine attributes – very masculine men who weave or make quite feminine things and don't feel threatened by that.
I remember too hearing once that it is quite traditional and normal for men in Norway knit. I think after all perhaps these things seeming masculine and feminine to us is to do with being British? That there is a different way that 'gender' operates on an everyday relation between the sexes level, in a European context.
My friend says "it would be great to meet a female hunter and see how she does thing differently / the same" – I think briefly of Guido's mom – he told me that she used to hunt. I would so love to meet her, but I have worked so very hard just to get this far with him, building up trust, and I suspect I would be pushing the boundaries too far to ask to meet his mother too.
I reply back to my friend – "yes, well maybe that could be me?" as I remember that I have seen a course in game keeping in the UK that I could do, and I remember that for a while I used to work in forestry. In the early 90's I worked in the lake district as a conservation volunteer with the BTCV; through that I gained my advance chainsaw certificate and did all sorts of things I would never have imagined myself doing before…
And so the making of this work continues.
