I have started to see again and since the retreat I meet Richard again to discuss my needs- I need to stop applying to opportunities and focus on the making, making solo work. But what is my solo work and how I do I make?
We meet in Hertford this time- I'm on home territory and it feels good. We walk to my local pub and both avoid alcohol- we knew we had to sort this out once and for all- he knew he had to sort me out once and for all. Before this meeting I have got into creating 'agenda's' for mentoring sessions and any other associated meetings. I have found the format really useful and a productive way to get all the information across and identify needs. They usually start with 'news' then a mentoring agenda with notes, reminders and AOB. Richard had received this copy prior to our meeting.
It was a pleasant evening, I was relaxed and found myself talking about my family, my up bringing, my parents and the village I lived in which is now where my studio is. Without knowing, this conversation had become interesting, filled with content, stories, a fondness and unease towards the information I was sharing. I had not spoke to Richard about my family before- he found it interesting, being out of London helped, I started to realise this was a big part of me that has been hidden up till now. It soon became clear that there was something in this to be explored.
Richard Suggests another meeting- I suggest a workshop, Im fed up with talking about it, I need to start, to make, to 'feel' it to get physical, I want it to start so that I can continue, get going, be in it, find it again, I wanted that more than anything right now. He agreed- we set a date it would be in a week- we would meet in Sandon Village hall- I knew it well from my childhood and teenage years, it was a big part of my up bringing, my family, my mother and continues to be. We would start by playing with some materials.
I was looking forward to it.
Good news- I have written an artist statement- This has given me much confidence. I thought it would never come.