it struck me today how the 4 week duration of the meanwhile space is going to fly by. there isn’t much room to hang about – massive pun unintended.
fitted in another visit late late last week. in it i roamed around the first and second floors. having being so obsessed with the vast window over looking the spot, it was actually refreshing to look at the areas we’d only glossed over on the induction session.
the top floor shows signs of investigations.
my investigations have turned up the table there is probably serviceable. in considering the leg relative to the top relative to the nut to secure them both together i started to do that thing of reading in human emotions into an inanimate object. i explored the separation of the elements with photography.
while on the top floor i felt a playful urge to investigate the sounds the table leg would make against the surfaces of the top floor. i wandered and the sounds and the wanderings in between made me feel very happy.
within the you tube description i’ve written about a realisation today around how i often have had an idea that i have turned into a video – and today i acknowledge that the above video is a sketch.
from the playful wandering and knocking to the sketch above i have put into some visual form something i thought about and did.
i’ll be honest with you – i’ve had this kind of process for a while and never really understood why there was such a feeling of anticlimax once i had the “video” together. i see now that that first “video” is in real terms a sketch, something to draw on, add to, use as a basis of something esle.
i do find it easier to make the video that to draw a sketch of it.
it’s put me into a place of acknowledging in myself how i sketch and awful lot yet rarely go onto the develop further / build on the learnings made from making the sketch.
i’m finding the process of creating during the residency really challenging as it’s getting me back into the process of creating again. with this comes conflict within me. it’s been so long since i experienced this that it all feels new, overwhelming and bouncing off of the notion i should stop it all.
but i stop and breath.
i feel my feet on the floor, listen to my breath coming in and bring myself back into the moment.
i’ve expressed within the frame work of the residency that i fell i an lacking the means to communicate what i do because i don’t fully understand what it is i’m doing.
if i use the lens of the multiple sketcher to examine the above paragraph, what emerges is from not completing anything of real meaning i am holding myself in a stasis of continual unresolved sketching.
there is a nod here to my neurodivergence and how the condition i have has a recognised trait of not completing things.
in considering what to do for the visuals of the poem response, i’ve reconnected to some 360 video shot during the lockdowns of last year. i want to try placing the tiny planet reframed videos next to the reading of the poem. i am going to record again me reading the poem.
i’m finding the poem hugely challenging and i think it’s a good fit to try it within the residency.
we’ve had word today of the support aspect of the programme so i need to make time to read and digest what the offer is.
it’s week 2 of 4 and it feels really important to immerse myself in all of this as much as possible – acknowledging and sitting with all that it throws up for me too.
after a wobbly start today, i am ending the day feeling positive and with a direction for tomorrow.
