Here I am again, two posts in two days after a long absence. How strange, but I sort of need to put into words some reflection on my current situation and how it will probably feed into new work.
My current work deals with ideas to do with memory, loss and the passing of time. While I was preparing for my show last Easter thoughts of my mother in law kept intruding. We have a bit of a history as some people say, when alluding to a difficult relationship; she has never been very nice to me and although I tried for years to gain her approval, I finally realised it was pointless. This coincided with my finally getting to art college, no coincidence I am sure. Anyway, this woman who has made my life very difficult intruded once again because she needed to be brought back to the UK this summer, being alone and getting frail and forgetful.
So during the making of one drawing in particular I was thinking about her memory coming and going, a life lived. I found myself obliterating parts, re drawing, and washing out, re drawing and so on. The edges of the drawing, like the edges of other drawings in the series, resembled the edges of textiles, knitting in particular, before it has been blocked and pressed. Knitting is about the only practical activity I ever remember her doing. This drawing is an important part of the current work and now, with evidence that my difficult mother in law is becoming ever more confused and frail, I find my thoughts turning to it increasingly and needing to get it out of its stiffy bag protection, to have it near by so that I can make some new pieces that react/lead on from it.
At the moment I am stuck at home waiting for a new wood pellet boiler to arrive, (we are dedicated eco refurbishers), but I do have to hand some paper, emulsion paint and drawing mediums, I’ll try and start some more pieces that react to the drawing and the developing situation with my mother in law’s health, if I can concentrate amongst the chaos. If anyone is reading this, I would welcome any comments and especially encouragement; I am feeling a bit marooned at home, unable to get to the studio!
