Blending Primaries

Read my interview with Shireen Qureshi: Straight from the Nerves

(thought I’d do straight forward in-your-face-advertising and cut to the chase)

P.S. I hope you like the interview.

Part 1

I’ve been procrastinating with this blog. I’ve felt a bit unsure of how to proceed because it seemed like I was doing a lot of ‘advertising’, to borrow David Riley’s word. The reality is curating This ‘Me’ of Mine has become my full time occupation and I have had scant time for producing work, though I do have some new ideas I’ve been working on. That is not a complaint, just a reality; I love the things that I’m engaged with in This ‘Me’ of Mine. But because of this I’ve felt my posts were becoming a bit lopsided. Then I stood back from myself and looked at the things that have happened recently and I felt I could finally write a post.

I failed to get into the Marmite Prize. I was really disappointed by that because I was very hopeful, but lesson learned: don’t get hopeful when dealing with open competitions, it’s a crap shoot and there is no way around it. If you’re lucky, you’re lucky; if you’re not, you’re not.

I was accepted to Axis. This is more rewarding than being selected to any open competition. The Axis application is demanding and it requires careful thought and good writing to convey what is happening with your practice. It’s not enough to send in a statement and a bio, you pretty well have to defend what you’re doing. Lesson learned: know what you’re on about and say it plainly. Rigour shows itself in clarity of speech.

I failed to get press coverage for ‘What’s time got to do with it?’ even though I had set up two reviews. They simply didn’t happen in the end because of unlucky timing. Lesson learned: it’s better to make a connection with writers who are interested in what you do than to make no effort to get press coverage.

I have been invited to become a contributor to Art Pie by one of those writer connections above, based on the writing I have been doing for This ‘Me’ of Mine. Totally unrelated to ‘What’s time got to do with it?’ Pierrick saw the This ‘Me’ of Mine blogsite, liked the content and made the invitation. What’s more he’s asked me to write about This ‘Me’ of Mine for Art Pie which gives me a wonderful opportunity to stand outside of the interviews and other blogsite content and comment from different angles and perspectives, not to mention giving me an opportunity to engage with a larger audience. It is challenging and very rewarding. Lesson learned: Always do your best, put yourself out there, make connections, you never know when things will swing back around to you. By the way the other writer I connected with for ‘What’s time got to do with it?’ is following the This ‘Me’ of Mine blog.

Scroll down for Part 2…



Part 2

I failed to win a large grant for This ‘Me’ of Mine. Lesson learned: Don’t be daunted by a seriously complex and rigorous application. The process is as valuable as the outcome – yes it is.

I was given a detailed evaluation and feedback on my grant application, something I hadn’t expected. My application was ‘seriously considered, well researched, timely in its subject, well written and all around excellent’, according to one assessor about the excellent part, both assessors agreed on the other points and one assessor said they learned something from the information contained in my proposal – you don’t hear that every day. Why didn’t it win? Because it failed in its attempt to meet a certain criteria. In other words, I was trying to make the project fit into something it isn’t. I learned a lot in the process and it has prepared me for other applications which are better suited to the project. I was disappointed, at one point I wailed inside, but the confirmation via the feedback, of work well done was invaluable to me.

I was starting to feel isolated again and cut off even though I am in contact with people from This ‘Me’ of Mine and other friends and colleagues almost daily. It is a difficult thing to be here working in what can nearly be called a vacuum because I often don’t know how the community at large is responding to the work I’m doing. Not being in London, I don’t get to hear the word that’s passing in the street, so to speak, and it’s difficult to gauge sometimes if anyone is noticing. Lesson learned: you’re tired! Take a break. Just keep working, people are watching whether you know it or not, something I learned when I first started writing blogs here on a-n.

Today (I wrote this on Friday 17^th Aug) I was mentioned in a #FF tweet by @an_artnews, and in mighty company, I might add, that small gesture made me feel like the larger community was aware and watching what I’m doing; what a pleasure, what reassurance and what encouragement.

My sincere thanks to @an_artnews, Pierrick Senelaer at Art Pie, the curators at Axis, my grant assessors, everyone involved in This ‘Me’ of Mine, all the project followers and silent watchers, and most importantly thanks to my husband, David who supports me in every way.

I hope you are enjoying the results so far.