The throwing classes at the Pottery Workshop in Jingdezhen have been going really well. I think a seed has been planted now and I want to continue making bowls. I can centre the clay on the wheel, throw and trim cylinders and bowls. Here are some photos of my teacher and my progress.
I made this pot (above). It’s not perfect but that’s the beauty of it.
Here are some other students working hard at the Education Centre.
Julie Wiggins (above) is an American potter and now she is a good friend of mine. She has been here a few times now, as with most of the resident artists. They all come back and I have a feeling I will return too. I have been shooting footage of Juile throwing these large shallow porcelain bowls. As she makes the bowls and I film her, we talk about how to look after our mental and physical health. As soon as I met Julie I felt connected to her. She goes to yoga and is very aware of her own wellbeing. That is something I need to learn. I just know our paths will cross again. Her friend Nate rides a motorbike and is pointing out some interesting places for me to go. I’ve worked out a better route now but I keep getting anxious about being behind schedule. Isn’t it funny how we can make so many plans and panic when we don’t reach our own expectations?
Sometimes being busy and throwing takes my mind off of things and at others my mind loops and thoughts cycle along with the potters wheel. My anti-depressants are running out so I am cutting them in half and coming off of them. It seems like a crazy time to be doing this but I just don’t want to come off of them cold turkey. Why is it called cold turkey? I only started them when I found out E was using and all the madness began. I want to live without them. I can do this.
Here are some very sad looking dogs. I knew I would come across this scene at some point.
Right now I have left Jingdezhen and I’m sitting on a coach, the journey is for three hours. First I took a taxi to the bus station, then this coach to Nanching, then a cab to the train station. From there I go to Changsha, Naning to meet a friend I made at Hostel in Hong Kong. I will stay wither Jio Jio and her family, having no idea what that will be like, it’s a bit scary. Nothing is in English and nobody speaks English. Sometimes people continue talking at me in Chinese, even though I make it quite clear that I have no idea what they are saying. The bus stations are really overwhelming due to this. I feel a panic setting in when I look at all the writing but somehow I always manage to be ok. We passed a big modern sculpture of a swan. My Nan used to always paint swans, so I felt like she was somehow telling me that I was doing ok and heading in the right direction.
I gave a talk about my work last week. The response and turnout was overwhelming.
There are a lot of artists in Jingdezhen from all over China, US and Australia. Some are contemporary artists and lecturers and others are fine craftspeople. A few of us get chosen to give a talk and we all support each other. Caroline Chen runs the Pottery Workshop and asked me to give a talk about my work. Here she is in her studio.
Caroline will be showing some work at the British Museum alongside other Chinese ceramics later next year. I will keep you informed.
Laura, who works at the Pottery Workshop, ordered a driver for me. He spent the day with me. We went to the Big Ware Factory, Sanbao International Residency and Gallery and a Hammer Mill. Usually people can visit while the huge pots were being thrown but I missed that. It’s quite hard to turn up to Jingdezhen independently, most people are either on a residency, affiliated in some sort of way or arrive with a tour group. If you are not any of those, you are not helped very much and it’s easy to feel lost and alone. I was lucky enough to pay for classes and give a talk; people were a little more welcoming to me. Friendship is business.
The vessels were impressive, way taller than me! Imagine throwing and firing these in the intense thick heat? I smoked as I looked around the warehouses because everyone else did. Everyone smokes everywhere, on the train platforms, restaurants and cabs. I don’t actually know if it’s allowed because people seem to look a bit sneaky about it. I found out that you can’t smoke on the streets in Hong Kong, only in designated areas, or you get a fine. Oops, I did that all the time. I need to give up smoking. That feels like such a pointless thing to say because people say it all the time. I used to smoke rolling tobacco but now it’s way easier to smoke straight fags.
The Sanboa International Residency programme is quite expensive, as I remember looking online. It’s a pretty little place, surrounded and trees and a rather murky river. These grounds consists of several little quirky buildings, with traditional wooden features and areas of rest. It was a bit dark inside when I visited, as the electric wasn’t working.
I went to a couple of galleries there and then to the Hammermill, which was down a very muddy country road. Don’t wear gold sandals or drop your lens cap out of the window into a thick sludgy mud trap. The car got stuck and some kind local man helped us. The taxi driver told me to get out at what looked like a building site. I was a bit puzzled. There were groups of workmen digging up rocks from near a stream and then they wheeled the rocks to the mill. From what I gather they grind the rocks with water and it becomes something to do with porcelain. I’m not really sure what this place is as nobody could give me any information. The work vehicle had the number 22 on it.
In the evening I attended a talk by an Australian ceramicist (I need to find out her name). Her work was very delicate with elongated handles and pierced surfaces. She questioned functionality. Most objects pointed towards particular uses, yet the artist wanted to keep this curiosity open to the user. The ‘User’, now that’s a more positive connection to the word.
Then we went to Brandon’s Schnur’s Exhibition ‘Given Function’. Lots of people attended and fireworks opened the exhibition! This was a good time to say my goodbyes to some very special people. I’m going to miss them.
When I arrived at Nanchan Bus Station, it seemed that taxi drivers were fighting to take me to the Rail Station. The man I had been sitting with on the coach looked after me and made sure I got into a licensed taxi. It was quite a long journey and a bit stressful. Everyone beeps their horns here, almost every time they pass a vehicle. I think it’s their way of saying ‘I’m here’ or ‘I’m behind you’. It’s more of a positive thing maybe? Arriving at the Railway Station was even more stressful. It was heaving with people. I had to guess where to buy a ticket, as there were lots of queues everywhere. I’m sure it was way more expensive than the estimate I had looked up earlier. I realised they had taken advantage of me as I’m now sitting in a First Class carriage with a free meal, cheeky. I already had food at the station, practically the same meal but in different containers.
I have to write the time my train gets to the station, otherwise I have no idea which stop to get off at, as it’s all in Chinese.
I hope I’m going to the right station because Jio Jio is meeting me there with her friend, apparently there are two stations. The train time is 16:22, so my number 22 is here once again; telling me it’s all going to be ok. I didn’t realise how superstitious I have become. When you’re travelling, you just have to trust people are going to take you to the right places and not take all of your money. At times it hits me. I’m travelling around China on my own! What on earth made me do this?
The view from the train window is almost certainly Chinese. In parts of Europe, the countryside can look very similar. The Chinese landscape has rugged greenery and red earth. There are blocks of high-rise buildings and construction sites everywhere. This may be an assumption but most residential places I’ve seen are ‘blocky’ and uncared for. Graveyard plots almost touch fields of solar panelling. People wear clothes with English slogans that just don’t make any sense. The teenage boy next to me has ‘Don’t You Flowers’ written on his t-shirt. I miss home comforts. I miss drinking cold water straight from the tap and sleeping on a thick matress. I miss my flat, Norwich and how it used to be. I know that is all behind me now and this is a transitional, transient period. I feel an overwhelming sense of longing, yet I don’t know what it is that I’m longing for.
The rain has been pouring down really hard over the past couple of days, so we’ve mostly been staying indoors. It’s homely here though and a rest is good. Jio Jio and her sister are lovely girls. Jio Jio loves Taylor Swift and going to shopping malls. I’ve actually hung out with her twice in the same mall. I purchased a new backpack as mine has broken, oh and some headphones (mine were stolen from my bed in the last dorm). When I went to pay for the bag, Jio Jio ran out of the store with my money and paid for it somewhere else in the shopping mall. She explained that none of the shops are independent here (even the Adidas and Nike stores) and the money goes through the mall first.
We’ve been having some great food and Jio Jio is a very good cook.
We also went to this crazy restaurant called ‘Piggy’. England, we need this chain.
This Mall is very odd.
These children are dressing up as the ancient Chinese of various dynasties. The girl in red is ‘Yang’.
‘Changsha has a 3,000-year history of occupation, and was an important center of the Chu State culture in the Warring States period (5th-3rd c. BC). The lacquerware and silk textiles recovered from a Western Han (2nd century BC) tomb at Changsha are an indication of the richness of local craft traditions. Changsha was the site of Mao Zedong’s conversion to communism. It was also the scene of major battles in the Sino-Japanese War of 1937-45 and was briefly occupied by the Japanese. ‘
– Wikipedia
We were going to go to an ancient kiln site but it’s been raining solidly for three days now and I leave tomorrow. We’ve been filling up our time with some girly fun.
Tomorrow I am going to the mountains where Avatar was filmed. I keep thinking of how behind I am on my schedule. I am getting a sleeper train and I’ve booked the top bunk. Apparently this isn’t as comfortable but it’s private. Otherwise people will just come along and sit on your bed. I’m praying for some English speaking people. Just so you have an idea how hard it is to book a ticket, take a look at this.
I have spoke to E a few times but each time I do, I get incredibly low. Why is it so hard to let go? He hasn’t really got the capacity to realise what he’s done to me because he’s still in it, doing it all to himself. I think he wants sympathy for the things he has done but I’m past feeling sorry for him now. I need to find my own way of healing from this trauma. This research trip has come at the right time, I’m away from it all. I feel delicate and very connected to China now. It’s a very hard slog but every part of it is worth the effort. I’ve spoken to a lot of crafts people along the way and most of them have had very tough and poor lives. I thought these people were so calm but pottery, carving, weaving, it’s all a way of making a living for them. Most importantly, it is a way of escaping and doing something that they love. E is a Stone Mason, hopefully one day he will find his escape in that skilled craft. I need to do the same.
