Now… repeating a picture of any sort that I have completed is something that I have turned away from… I am a perfectionist… so, everything has to be right with it and I can get very upset if I make a mistake… so, repeating a picture means it’s going to be different…
So far I have managed 4.
No 1. Despair 
Painted on 2 x 2 ft. MDF board, using palate knives using just the plain pigment of black, white and purple with nothing added in to it, it depicts my feeling of despair of being pulled in to the black hole in the center… the spiral was done by making a template, which I attach to the painting and the using a short-bristled brush and splatter paint on the exposed part using white, silver, gold and bronze. this gives the feeling of falling in to the center.
This one I do like very much as I do feel that it represents how I feel.
No2. 2 Become 1
Painted on 2 x 2 ft. MDF board, plain pigments with nothing added in to it, of blues and purple although they look almost black, the center is red and the ying/yang symbol is gold and bronze, this hasn’t turned out how I had intended it to, when I came back in to the studio I didn’t like it, it looked far too dark, I sat and looked at it for around half an hour and realized the circles round the center look like shadows of people looking down at the center, I decided that I needed to lift it so using silver and gold highlighted the shape of the two circles.
But am not sure if it really says that now
No3. Desire/ Contentment
Painted on 2 x2 ft. MDF board, , plain pigments with nothing added in to it, the two loving figures in the center are painted with gold and silver, and then pink and red with purple on the outer edg, and touches of silver on the purple and then covered the couple in the center and then splattered white gold and silver to give the feeling of two people in that moment of being one.
No 4. Sadness
Painted on 2 x2 ft. MDF board, , plain pigments with nothing added in to it, at the center I had tried to paint a tear drop but it didn’t look like one, it was more like a seed pod so I painted over it with a dark blue in to a lighter blue making the brush strokes radiate out towards the edge and in the corners purple with the palate knife, because I didn’t like the center I used the splatter painting with white gold and silver, if you look closely you can still see the tear drop/ seed pod but its not so noticeable , and the same from the corners.
Although its meant to represent Sadness it was suggested to me that it felt more like Hope.
This really hasn’t been working, all 4 are too contrived. I have no connection with them, I guess you could say that there is no, feeling in them, all 4 of them are not particularly colorful, with each one I have tried to use different texture.
