The adrenalin is beginning to gather and flush through my arteries in increasing quantity.. Everything is due to go up on monday.. I have delegated the task of making my projection screen stands to a sculptor and am going to take a look at his work this morning. There is the sense of: "Have I got the passport !!!", is there something essential that I forgot ?
Yesterday I had a meeting with one of the musicians who will perform one evening, marking the midpoint of the exhibition. Their performance will respond directly to the content of the work. So it will be an audio interplay of a holistic whole to a Babel like (musical) conflict between the individuals.
I had an interesting conversation with a Buddhist yesterday, it refocused some of my attentions and brought back into the light the motivations with which I began this project….I will re-edit this later, only now I am getting indigestion trying to eat breakfast, write and look at my list of things to do.. Multitasking is for people with stronger stomachs..
(Should you want to get in touch with me, then you can do it through this link… http://www.myspace.com/papersculptures )
Today has been spent organising items for the show. Borrowing projectors, ordering spare parts, seeking out a few solutions to a few glitches.. Finding a carpenter to help with the making of screens and being invited to join another small project after I conclude this part of this one.
Art is taking up a large part in my life, some friends are angry with me for not finding the time to be with them. I am a workaholic, I will die lonely..
It was mostly an art free day.
Except for Plato who snuck under my duvet, so I read a discussion on knowledge in ‘Theaetetus’.
Tomorrow I will assemble loopers, order drive belts and spare lamps for the projectors. Then it is time to panick and pull several rabbits out of hats. I want to re-shoot the film.I am not happy with what I currently have. The show opens in just over a week at the Anglican Cathedral Liverpool…
I am so grateful for the Tate online events archive! (http://www.tate.org.uk/onlineevents/archive/) Watching lectures stimulates, inspires and shakes one out of moments of nervous doubt. Other people take a shower to refresh while I listen to a lecture, read a book or a culture review… (Which could render me quite smelly… however…)
This morning I by chance had an opportunity to speak to an artist from former Yuoslavia (not saying that qualifies him in any special way, however his responses did ..); and I feel back on track, all it took were a few words with a senior artist who has accrued some wisdom that can only come with the passing of time.
And the sense of calm is restored.
I am still pushing furniture, convincing myself that the repositioning of bulky items will clarify obstacles and questions in art.. It is bank holiday, sensible people put their feet up altogether.. Perhaps I will in future make work about leasure and sloth-ness; rather than moral and identity which are slippery fish..
It started to rain outside: perfect conditions to get on with work.
Regarding Progress:
The exhibition is due to open in 9 days and it doesn’t quite feel real yet. There is a mountain of work yet to be conquered..
I am clear now that I won’t again entangle myself in another un-funded project like this. The costs have been phenomenal. I think it is hideous the way that we can be such good artists but then still find ourselves baffled by the task of fundraising. It’s a bit of a defeat for me..
But I am counting on that this project will be sufficient to raise my profile for future funding to find me (yes, I dream, but it is part of what brought me to the arts..)..
And here is a quote I found when I researched Menschlichkeit / humanness:
Wer den Hafen nicht kennt, in den er segeln möchte, für den ist kein Wind ein günstiger.
Seneca, Philosoph (um 4 v.-65 n.u.Z.)
(That is approximately:
He who doesn’t know which port he wants to sail to,
for him no wind is favourable..)
