When I look at these quick sketches of faces made on the acetate sheet, I see that they are not like any of the other work I am painting. They are loose and quick observations which I don’t seem to be able to carry into the larger canvases. The canvases are more careful and studied applications of the paint, where every line has a purpose and has to contribute to the overall appearance of the whole composition, whereas these acetates are a freedom of sweeps and swirls, mark making that almost accidently represent forms. I didn’t have a composition in mind with these, they were just as the paint suggested the mixing and blending of the tones should be.
The size of the canvas seems to give a mind block as to the amount of free expression that I am allowing myself to express. I am setting rules for myself which don’t exist outside of me. Small rebellions against this are allowed on a small painting surface which can be easily discarded whereas a large canvas is not so easily hidden away without anyone seeing or judging.
In my dissertation I wrote about the change in style that happened to Lucian Freud. His early work was very detailed, using small brushes and mostly working on small canvases.
Lucian Freud, (1947), Girl with a Kitten, [ Oil on canvas], 41x30cm, Bequeathed by Simon Sainsbury 2006, to Tate Britain.
With the influence of his friend and fellow artist Francis Bacon, Freud was inspired to buy large hogs hair brushes that enabled him to apply paint in a way that gave expression of flesh in its rich texture and flow onto the surface and into the portraits he made from then on.
Lucian Freud, (2000/01), Her Majesty the Queen. [Oil on canvas], 23.5×15.2cm, Part of the Royal Collection
Note to self – loosen up! (I aspire to this thought everyday but think it will take some time to change).
