‘Out of my depth’
Portmouth 27th July
Disappointed at the letter that slips through the door.
I wanted to make today but that’s not possible now
The cloak placed on my shoulders wraped around me unforgivably.
I feel totally out of my depth with the tears that flow from my OH. She recieved an un-expected expected letter today rescinding all her mobility DLA – the letter is full of inaccuracy – that I can deal with but her tears no – overwhelming not a lack of empathy as some say aspies are good at. That empathy is different – its about placing yourself in someone else’s head not about being unfeeling.
The day ends with 20 inches of badly
I recognize that fighting a battle on 2 fronts cant be won
internal
external
I have to choose
close eyes and look forward
concentrate
Drill
in through
my Forehead
inject me
with
bitter waters
jealously
remove
my uniqueness
With forced words
to fuel
your fires
Frack me
So where is Heaven?
Portsmouth 27th July
Today I am asked where is my ideal of heaven – I talk about beaches – If i can I love being on a beach – the incoming tides waves for complex patterns – each looking the same to the ordinary person – in – out – each is different – each tastes different – pattern acting on pattern as they interfear with each other – complex compositions laid bare to discover.
Beach memory no17
As a child
Of five
Collecting
Coloured stones
On a beach
Strewn
In tidelined
jelly fish
Against cliff
Carved
olistostrome
http://totko.org/2013/08/11/spotlight-jon-adams-fr…
‘Running, running out of words’
Portsmouth 28th August
So how do I explain a months absence?
has the project finished as expected?
In hiatus?
no
I hope the following posts will catch the blog up over the next few days
There is too much to say- nearing the end of the project officially but it seems to have gained a new life – new unexpected breath – I will try to list in order.
August has been a storm breaking – wrapped up within my aspergers too – the way I relate to the world documented here.
Explaining
my absence
from here
running
out of
wo
A Sunday very shortlist
Portsmouth 21st July
Awake and up early – we had to shut the window last night due to chimney smoke – who and why they would need a fire in their house in this weather but at midday received Good news for the project today,
1. Date for documentary interview filming with Prof Simon BC in Cambridge confirmed
2. Moved and watered plants in garden after news came
3. Ignored Casino Royale on TV 17 minutes before news came
4. Eating apple pie when the news came
Thank you for following this blog – it will continue as we evaluate the project and apply to take the project further for Konfirm 2 but I am now continuing to blog here:
www.a-n.co.uk/p/3612518
I have spent 3 years logging my every move and my engagement as an artist within the London 2012 Cultural Olympiad – the project was awarded Cultural Olympiad branding and I had unique access in the South East of England to artists projects and perfomers
I have mapped my personal life, ups and downs decent into illness and the death of my mother alongside endless travel and engagement with London 2012 projects.
The final artifact will be a geological map complete with stratigraphy and complex timelines – later an Ibook complete with these crossections and study of fossils (at least 5000 collected items – almost a hoarder)
This is the blog for reviewing all the 1000 day logs as we investigate for the first time and then drawing the map from all the fragments that have been incidentally collected.
