Re-folding 7 complex envelopes
Portsmouth November 15th: weirdly am not awake at 4am – ironic as I miss this familiar friendship although the dreams are 99% the same – wonder if this is a permanent change or just chance – will need a few days to start to systemize any differences or find the pattern – for now the break is obviously improvement – a whole self whispering aspergers tells me from one shoulder there is a shift somewhere difficult to pin point on my ring of fire but all connected.
Thursday – self centering – I decide to stay in – unheard of but resting and testing is coexistent. Now the reading and reading and reading which can be broken into segments and stapled for easy digestion and attention span – ordering by alphabet or position is the next choice but I am unable to decide so push to one side – all abandoned – not needed as yet. Start to take apart to put together – turning to self I connect – connect – in – out – turn – attenuate. Distracted by pain I sit to simple tasks of relabeling with coloured stickers drawn to colour references and meanings – setting out new codes so I cannot forget – short term memory deficiency – I always say I won’t forget but then do – many times I have forgotten – dysmemory function resorts to writing it down but effective only if I can read my own spider handwriting – if I have to ask someone else to read it why not ask them to remember in the first place?
A visual spatial gift – maybe draw to remember not drawn to remember – maybe I should go and sit under the pier to shelter from the rain – a steel boat upturned in a desert – hot and reddened with sun or age.
I wish to hear – 48 choices each of 60 – hastiness patience prevails– the pedulum swings back and forth accompanied with red dots filling in the squares that can come later – I decide to read again unveiling system warnings laced with common sense.
‘If on occasion I should behave in unexpected or undesired fashion, the user should review the configuration entered to make sure it actually makes sense’