‘More than common intervals – a circle of fifths’
Portsmouth December 27th:
Been waking at 4 again – disappointed – head filled with misdirections – unsorted effects
Possibly this will be the last post of this year – I am trying to motivate after 6 days off – took 3 days to unwind enough not to notice I wasn’t working – ‘not working well’ – not been working at 100% for a while due to the PTSD but did my best – ‘artist wanted 24/7
present four: an intact bottle of whiskey
I find the whole situation ‘aspieunsatisfactory’ – after being repeatedly told sometimes that’s ‘all you can do’ – I am not sure I believe that – Carry on regardless despite the ‘aspieperfectionist’ that sits on both shoulders whispering opposites in both ears at once – a heavy burden to bare at the best of times let alone difficult ones
present three: 6 plain yellow and black pencils
tick tock tick tock – Seems I will be glad to leave 2012 behind in a few ways – Mum passing – becoming unwell – but may miss the time in diverse ways more – the stopping of collecting for Look About – 2012 has seen the start of working in Cambridge – the passing of the Torch Relay – RSA
Unsure about climate for artists in 2013 – maybe a year to concentrate on securing artists being centric despite the shifting climate and evolving environments.
Short break to fill bath with water using stack crate and kitchen sink
For me the most valuable is time to think and experiment – whether that be with a pencil and paper – a computer – a situation or sound – who will pay for artists to experiment? how do you attribute outcomes to satisfy an employer or grant giver?
present two: 12 coloured pencils in plain tube
Can be done – you can be selfish in developing yourself – Unfortunately an often ignored contribution to the wider community – Wondering – maybe need to make sure it stays that way.
KTS not KT boundary layers
Back to the dreams and repetitive waking at fear o’clock in the morning.
present one: a gift of chickens via ‘actionaid’
