meeting points and disconnects: the cultural nuances of emotional expression.

Looking back over the three months in china and how it has fed into my work – it provided time to move away from a technology based practice and focus again on video, as well as move into new areas such a subtle public performance. It allowed insight into how the art scene works in another country as well as a great opportunity to meet artists, curators, and other arts workers. Personally, it provided an incredible cultural experience, not only myself, but also my husband and child who traveled with me. To be immersed into new ways of living, eating and drinking gives a profound experience and insight, one that will be reflected on for a long time. It was both challenging and brilliant, and probably won’t be fully understood for a few years.

The Asialink residency is a very valuable residency program, highly regarded both in Asia and Australia. Coming to China, under the umbrella of Asialink, I felt really embraced by other artists, curators and arts organisations. The residency allows enough of an organizational umbrella, with a self directed ethic which is important, as it responds to the artists needs.

I can’t believe China is now past, and I can’t wait to go back

We headed to Shanghai after that – I had an idea that I wanted to explore performed emotion – a few businesses in China are teaching their staff to smile in a ‘western’ way. They do this training via using chopsticks between the teeth – the goal is to show six to eight teeth. After a lot of phonecalls, I couldn’t find any inpoint into the businesses. Reflecting, I needed a really good translater early on. We tried to shoot more barber shops, however, no one wanted to be in front of the camera in Shanghai. Businesses were unregistered, and they didn’t want to be highlighted. We ate a lot, we caught up friends and we did some sight seeing.

We then went to Chongqing to start a residency with Organhaus. I had come to Chongqing to film the funeral criers on Chongqing – by hiring professional mourners, I think the idea is, is that the criers help conjure up emotional intensity. The wailers are performers, paid to cry for the deceased through anguished songs. It is an ancient custom, but during Mao’s Cultural Revolution wailing was banished, however now it is making a comeback, mostly, it seems by the more wealthy Chinese. I filmed seven mourners.The performers usually are professional singers, often singers of the Peking Opera. Starting off with a slow speech, they fall to the ground, which moves onto to arms wailing and then singing and moaning that had such an overwhelming intensity – They slowly make there way forward after much dramatic movement – throwing themselves on the ground. After the performance, they quickly stand up, wipe their tears and get changed back into their normal clothes. For some reason, Chongqing has many funeral criers – up to 2000 of them. I am still yet to find out why this is. Funeral crying is popular in eastern europe, in Taiwain, and Greece, and this maybe be something I keep exploring. I am interested in the performed emotion, the role of tears, and the search for authenticity. This will most likely become a video installation.

To me, Chongqing felt like the heart of China. A big part of a residency is just being in new environments – which is incredible – but it always takes a long time to settle before work can begin. When we leave our flat, we are propelled onto the street – strange smells, shouting, food – we can’t stop for long with out pablo getting crowded with mums showing their kids what a little western boy looks like. People are gambling, selling, yelling, going about business. The street life here is incredible. It will make Australia and Berlin feel like it is dead.

The Asialink residency in China was an incredible, life changing opportunity, one that allows artists a great amount of time to be immersed in a culture foreign to ones own. Being absorbed in such a different environment creates a deep awareness of your day – there is constant responding and adjusting, time seems to go slower, by the end of the day you seem to have learnt more than you knew in the morning. For me, being engrossed in such unusual surroundings allowed for a greater freedom to explore new mediums, approaches and ideas, most likely because I was also discovering new sides to myself.

I am shocked that my asialink residency in China has come to an end. Its been an amazing time, where I have felt like I have lived here, and its strange to think about leaving and to think about life after China. You spend a lot of time looking forward to coming here, and then when your here – the differences, the culture, the food, the pace is all so strange and new, you are immersed in it – and life outside of China doesn’t exist. Its hard to find news, its not often you get to speak or read much english. After afew bad attempts we found a VpN service that works, so we can get on a wider range of news sites. After a few weeks, its all easy and flows along, and then the next minute you have to think about leaving, and think about life back in the real world. How does life happen after China? I think back to life in Australia, and it feels so quiet, easy and tranquil compared to the chaos of China. We wonder if we will be bored. I think about leaving the food behind, the flavours, the crazy traffic, the different foods in different regions – Oh, I will miss it so much. On the other hand, I won’t miss the traffic, and I do look forward to seeing blue sky and breathing fresh air.

It will also be interesting to reflect on the work I have done in China. I came here to look at the how globalization is effecting the cultural nuances of emotional expression. Thats a big ask to do in three months – pretty much unacheivable – I am more confused now than when I started. It takes a long time to know the nuances of a people – years and years, not months. Interestingly, I saw more similarities than differences – just another people, dealing with the pressures of life, with probably a lotm ore family commitments and expectancies than we have in Australia. In China, I felt like I was at hthe center of the world, ther was little news about the ‘outside’ world – one jsut becomes engrossed in dealing with everyday life.

I started the Asialink residency in Beijing with a residency at Platform China, with an idea to go to Shenyang, as I heard there was a shop there, that, after paying 30RMB, allowed women to smash appliances in order to vent anger. I thought that this was an interesting american idea, with a japanese outcome, of venting anger. After much research, we found it had all closed down. It was open for a year, and like most strange things cropping up in China, got great internation media coverage.

In Beijing, we met heaps of people and found ourselves immersed in a vibrant art scene. The artist studios felt like factories of artists, the galleries in 798 and cao Chang Di were never ending. There was an incredible interest in the arts, mostly commercially driven. We found the people incredibly warm and generous, and over an art opening, we decided to make a big dinner. Matt, my husband who is a chef agreed to cook. We got five seamstresses to track the emotional connections of the table – by the end of a night a web existed. It was an interesting move for my work, into a new direction, mixing intervention, video, food, wine. The social, responsive, performance aspect intrigued me. Was this something that could just happen in China – no – it could be anywhere. What did it say about China, a lot of the guests talked about the the acceptance of the ‘Chinese’, the fact that they didn’t fight being weaved together. These were mostly western guests, the Chinese guests talked about the sharing, highlighting how interconnected they were to each other, binded by expectations, love and compassion.

We did another hair dresser shoot today. Matt and I have been fiming hairdressers around the world. We just place to camera they for a few hours, in front of the hair dressing chair and let it roll.. We have found after a while that the people forget the cameras there – and action just unfolds. So far with have shot in Turkey, Beijing, now Chongqing. We set up the camera on a tripod and leave it running. We leave the hairdresser and set ourselves up in a cafe near by. I keep running back and forward to check all is OK with the shoot, and pablo trails me, wanting to know what we are up to. By the end of the shoot, all the waitresses were follwoing me up to the hairdressers to work out what was going on.

Time is running out fast. We lost electricity again, so our electricity box was beeping, so the neighbours came out again to see what is going on. They must think we are idiots – this is the third time this has happened.And the beeping alarm is an annoying sound that ricochets through your head – everyone can hear it. first night we managed candles – which was fine, but its getting pretty cold now. The problem is we need to know how to cash up the electricity card, and then the office closes, so your out of electricity until they open. Apparantly there is only a certain ‘zone’ office you can go to. We lost it on Saturday, so all was closed till monday. We were told we use ‘too much electricity’, which is probably true, but it is three of us in the apartment, not one person – and I want to keep my son warm, and I am paying for it, so I don’t mind using it right now. I was then told I should let them know before it runs out – and this would be great – if someone told me how to read the electricity box so I would know that it was about to run out! Sometimes I find myself getting frustrated not knowing how things are done. The constant learning, the adapting is both wonderful and tiring. Pablo handled it well, he usually doesn’t like the dark, but he didn’t complained and enjoyed the candles.

Anyway, I lost a few days to no electricity and we hung out in the Moons’ cafes, drinking tea and using the internet, trying to warm up, but no one really uses heaters here. We don’t really have the right clothes for the cold. Anyway, we then put heaps of cash on the card, so I don’t think it will run out for a while.

Losing electricity made me think its time to head south, to the warmer climates. We are thinking of moving onto Guanxi, searching for warmer weather and see a bit of China. It will be sad to leave chongqing – we have felt at home here, we have loved the food, we have met some great people.

I did a talk to Organhaus, after a shaky start with the projector not liking my computer, it went OK, I tried to keep it simple as she, translated the talk. The discussion afterwards went for a couple hours, so that was interesting. i met some artists that I wish I had meet a month ago. Well, I wish I had done this talk a month ago, but its hard to know how thing work here – the timings of when things get done are a bit different, and I am still trying to work out the rhythms and by zen about it. Organhaus starts work at 5pm, so its been difficult to sit down with Nikun, the curator and discuss ideas. However, she has made herself available – she has been really wonderful.

I still have some more tanslations to do as well – I hope we can fit them in. She has been fantastic, i will miss her. This is the problem with residencies, you make friends, you feel like you live here and then you leave. It all falls in to a memory, an ‘experience’, that you will probably realize the importance of years later.

As the weather has been cold, we have been frequently having ‘hotpots’ for lunch – a big boiling soup like dish filled ot the brim with chillies and oil. We then add vegetabels and meat. This is accompanied by beers to cool down the chillie. Its been pretty wonderful, however matt got really really sick – he was up all night, vomiting for hours the poor guy. I thought I might be next, but I seemed fine. Matt thinks the beer he drank might have been off.

We told the girls at Moon bar we will be leaving soon – oh, they got so upset about Pablo, our son leaving! Oh no! they cried, more chocolates came out, and he loves it.Oh, we should have free tea, free beer’ they say. I am left stumped again by the constant generosity.