and today is a bit strange. this morning i was all good and ready to do the tasks on my to do list. but all my hand kept doing was pressing snooze on my alarm. and when i did eventually get up it wasn't as late as i had thought. so i got up and sat at my desk. eating cerials right out the box. its just easier this way. and i thought about a text message i got last night and it made me angry. and i guess thats how i stayed for a few hours, angry. i diddn't reply. i don't want to. i don't ever want to reply. but i know i have too, and i think thats why i'm angry. as well as becuase of what was said. why do people think that they can tell me what to do? and why does someone think that if they said jump, i'm going to say how high?. becuase i'm not. your not as important to me and you seem to think. and anyway time passed and i thought that i might cry. untill the hussle driffted out of the speakers. you can't cry whilst listening to the hussle. although this time i diddn't get up and dance, i just sat, bemused. and then it was only when i heard lambchop – the distance from her to there, that i did actually cry. and as soon as i started i stoped. i'm not quite sure whats going on. i think i've finished my interogating context writting. which is a good thing i so pose. another thing to cross off on my list. if only i just didn't feel so strange today. i'm not even sure if i want to go outside. and not just becuase its been raining. and maybe i'll get some lunch and go to the libary. and make eyes with geeks. oh why is everything such a disaster?
nottingham trent
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