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I am not required to write a dissertation to complete my degree. Instead at NTU Fine Art students are required to hand in 7 staged pieces of writing beginning with a statement of intent and including two 1000 word essays about the context of our practices.

Tomorrow is the deadline for the first writing task and I am done with it. During the last week I felt completely overwhelmed by moving into my third year. Too many commitments, the start of a 25 week countdown and a lot of seminars and deadlines within the first 10 weeks. I’m never quite sure that Fine Art is the perfect course for me and when under pressure I start to fantasize about alternative routes.

I’ve had to make a choice about what to not do. The first and least necessary thing is to apply for any MAs. Its unrealistic to think that I could be starting a curation course next September and it would be wise to build up a fund first. The second is to stop justifying what I do. I’ve had difficulty presenting work within the studios, usually because I’ve made work specifically for assessment out of fear of having nothing to show. New outlook: I have a practice, you just can’t always see it. (That still needs some work).

Tomorrow is the 3rd installment of ‘In Production’ at Nottingham Contemporary. I’m excited and anxious. I’ve got an idea of a few audience members who I will be happy to see and I think the artists lined up will be great. Mainly I’m looking forward to seeing their new work and the discussion with the audience. I’m trying not to think too hard about giving the introduction. I’m a nervous but frequent public speaker.

The Research Portfolio (the collection of writing produced over the final year and handed in alongside the degree show exhibition) feels like it has started today with my first hand in. There’s a lot to do before christmas, my work always seems to throw up a lot more questions than answers. I’m not sure at all how the year will resolve itself. End game approaches, only 24 weeks to go.


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