i’ve been out for walk, not on my own.
having got back i’m faced with a mind full of thoughts of doubt and non anger. i know i’m not angry, i’ve been through the emotional mine fields necessary to progress through mid life teenage realisation about the world around me.
doubt is totally coming from having to wait for the result of responding to an invitation to submit to a graduate bursary programme and wait to find out if i will get an interview for a part time job at a local college. a job drawing on my 20 years theatre and event production experience.
i’m not emotionally prepared for this situation. hence my personal self is experiencing some difficult day to day survival pangs.
needless to say i am worried by the prospect of not getting one or other or both. i’ve not put myself so on the line before.
until i hear something i feel inclined to sit quietly in a corner of a dimly lit room, typing about my life experience, not worrying about if any one will ever read it or want me to write more for them.
maybe cinema tickets and cups of tea. xx
