The Pearl Fisher

I write as I am awaiting delivery of 25 “Black Flag Game”, compendia intended for my show in Bath. The work is nearly complete and packed in my large traveling trunk. My only remaining issue is whether to rerecord the sound on one piece and how to chain two telescopes to the walls of the gallery. I have been warned repeatedly that the intelligentsia of Bath are not to be trusted and will carry off anything that is not nailed down. As I wait I am reviewing some of my correspondence particularly rejection letters.

Commissions East recently invited me to apply for a residency at the HMS Ganges museum in Shotley, I was informed that I was part of a selected long-list and so I replied forthwith with a small packet of goods including a DVD, C.V., etc. It was a bit of a rush as the deadline was tight but buoyed with hopeful confidence; I had gone some way towards spending the £17500 budget (in my head).

Dear Alex

Please find attached a letter regarding the shortlisting for the HMS Ganges Museum residency. Unfortunately on this occasion you were not selected by the panel.

Any materials submitted will be returned to you shortly along with a hard copy of the letter for your files.

I hope another opportunity will come up for us to work together in the future.

With best wishes

Siân

I feel that telling me I have failed in an email, attaching a letter telling me I have failed and posting me another letter telling me I have failed is a little like being repeatedly pummelled by a wet pillow.

Nevertheless I am not downhearted though I was looking forward to recreating John Noakes’ failed attempt to reach the ‘button’ on the top of HMS Ganges’ infamous mast.

Jordi Lafon’s performance and a nice little networking dinner beckoned as my companion and I set off for Bedford on Saturday. I was looking forward to catching up with old friends and meeting Dawn as we have spoken a number of times on the telephone. My companion had poured two litres of oil into her car, something she assured me that she always did. I offered to drive and we set off in reasonable time despite an unfortunate toilet stop due to a little overindulgence and a curry the night before. As I pulled onto the A14 and accelerated, the little car laid down a smoke screen that James Bond’s Aston Martin would have been proud of and a loud screaming noise that would have made Moneypenny blush. The screaming may have been mine as I pulled shakily into a lay-by much to the amusement of an RAC man who was already waiting. My companion is outstanding in a crisis and soon inveigled the hapless mechanic into an impromptu oil change. He was much grubbier and less jolly (though he did pocket a little gratuity) by the time we pulled away. Judging that we would now be very late and that my nerves were delicate enough already we headed back to Ipswich to find a not so free lunch. We parked and began to walk back into the centre of town taking a short cut through the old college buildings. I was nervous of attempting such a brash act as they are officially closed while undergoing building work. My companion however laughed at my cowardice and led us onwards. After a while it became clear that the obvious routes through this rather dubious short cut were blocked. The uncertainty of our position was making me feel increasingly apprehensive we eventually exited the building through a fire exit that (in retrospect) closed behind us with the finality of a cell door. We were now outside but surrounded by twelve foot security fencing that was quite impregnable, there was no way out! Nor could we retrace our steps and re-enter the building. We were trapped! After some time, and some frantic pacing, a woman walking a small dog passed on the other side of the fence. Hailing her we explained our predicament and suggested she might raise the alarm or at least pass a note to our loved ones but to my dismay she seemed unwilling and hurried on. I have to admit by this time I was beginning to fear for my life. Despite the reassurances of my companion, I felt there was a dread of loneliness in the place which chilled my heart. We did another circuit of our cage looking for weaknesses or signs of life. I began to weigh up attempting the fence; it was topped with fearsome spikes and looked difficult to climb.

read the full post at www.thepearlfisher.blogspot.com

Someone in San Antonio googled ‘ghosts, feeling touching chest in bed’ and arrived at this blog. I am concerned that they may need help and will not find it here. For me, yet another conversation looms this time at BCA, Bedford. I am to talk to Chris Dobrowolski. Last year when I was not in Antarctica he was and we are to compare our experiences. I am assuming he was generally colder than me although I spent several dangerous hours at a bus stop in early March. http://ajpjournals.blogspot.com/2008/02/incident-in-birmingham.html

My companion has taken to sleep walking, this morning her feet were covered in a fine grey dust.

Emails received 06/10/09

Hi Alex

did we decide on arrangements for when you will be here during installation and will you need accommodation on campus then or on the night of the preview? Normally for the in-discussion the artist and other person tend to meet up around lunchtime in order to look at the work and have a chat.

Hi Dan

No you are right, we didn’t decide on dates. I’ve left from 25th-31st

October completely free, are any of those days ok? I would be happy to stay over also to get it done. For the opening and discussion, I would like to travel up early on the day and stay overnight. I am right that it is

Wednesday 4th November? My girlfriend has expressed a mild interest in joining me would there be room on campus for us both?

I have another telescope now, hooray for eBay.

All the best

Alex

Hi Alex

Why don’t you stay over for two nights (28th and 29th October)?

Is there anything we can do ahead of time?

What screen ratio for the films 16:9 or 4:3?

Charles the technician will be there for you.

He could also finish bits off on the following Monday and Tuesday.

The talk is indeed on Wednesday 4th November.

I’ll try to get a double room arranged for you and your girlfriend.

It would be good if you and JJ could meet up around lunchtime to spend the afternoon looking at your work.

I’ll ask him what time he’s thinking of arriving.

Best wishes

Dan

Hi Dan and Charles
That’s great I’ll stay those two nights. The films are 4:3 except Cyclorama on the bigger tv which will be 16:9 but with a black border. I’ll need a projector to use for the tracing. I think apart from that we should be ok. Oh and stepladders for the high pieces. I can get a train that gets in for just after midday so there should be time for JJ and me to get together.
See you soon ish
Alex

My correspondence needs to be wittier

No stranger to discomfort I have agreed to another appearance talking in front of an audience. Again it will be in Cardiff and I am beginning to think the city may harbour some sort of deep seated grudge against me. This time I will be speaking about blogging and social networking at “May you Live in Interesting Times”. In addition to this the Spectre of my ‘in conversation’ in Bath looms. On the 4th of November I am to present myself to a surly audience of academics (I imagine) my only hope is that JJ Charlesworth will protect me. I imagine him as man who knows what he is talking about better than any one else; a philosopher and a metaphysician, and one of the most advanced theorists of his day. He has, I hope, an absolutely open mind. This, with his iron nerve, temper of the ice-brook, and indomitable resolution and self-command should make the evening bearable. I think the show itself is ready although things keep coming to mind and slipping away before I can grasp them. Most importantly I promised to attempt a large tracing on one of the walls, I must make at least one practice session before November.