It strange being in the Orangery, a mixture of space for me to work and explore while feeling isolated and disconnected from the rest of the park…
I’ve realised my discomfort comes from a lack of security and a fear of the unknown. Seeing the public as a possible threat and having to take precautions (like locking the door) which serves the purpose of disconnecting me from the rest of the parks activities. I know intellectually that I need to keep myself safe, but emotionally, I want to trust the best in people and that I will not only be safe, but I may actually have some good conversations. Would it be different if I couldn’t see or hear people walking past (and in some cases smell!) What can be done to help this feeling go away?
The phrase ‘Duty of Care’ has been floating around and poking its moralistic nose into conversations lately, and I find myself wondering what that duty is? And who is responsible for it? Ourselves?
At school, I have a duty to care for pupils I am working with, so how does that extend out into the art world? Do Arts Organisations have a duty to care for it artists, whether in residence or freelancing for them? Does the Arts Council have a duty of care when funding artists? Do Local Authorities have this duty of care when they give permission for public spaces to be used? Are there any precautions in place to keep the artist safe? Who holds the moral responsibility when something goes wrong that no-one predicted?
This fear is driven by events external to the Orangery, but I am aware of the impact of my vulnerability hangover is having. I may need to go on a detox plan to cleanse my system of these feelings.
On a positive note, I got to play with plaster yesterday and my forms are now drying nicely, ready for when I go in next week and can start sanding.
I was looking forward to this residency and I’m not sure yet if I’m actually enjoying it…
