Frank Auerbach (1958) Self-portrait [charcoal, watercolour on paper]
Occasionally, rarely, something hits you like a bolt of lightning and everything changes in second.
My lovely friend and fellow artist Val has been writing a blog and I’ve been following her updates. She messaged me to say she had written another post, so I sat down and had a read. And it was there, that image, that lightning strike happened instantly. I looked and couldn’t look away at this self-portrait by Frank Auerbach. Of course I’ve seen his work before. In fact only the other day I was looking through an old sketchbook in which I had collected and scribbled notes about artists who inspired me. Inside there were two pages of his drawings. They are sad, disturbing, unnerving and a reveal into the depths of the soul. Each mark on the paper tells a story of the person depicted. The sketchbook was from my first year at university. He’s always been there but only now have I seen Frank Auerbach.
First year sketchbook – artist research
I don’t know if I can describe what it is about that portrait what has affected me so much but I’ll try. He’s there underneath, inside each of those torn bits of paper. His self-portrait reveals everything about what it is to be human. He is vulnerable, breakable but his eyes tell you he is untouchable and this is a man will never reveal all his secrets. Visually the portrait is beautiful. Emotionally Auerbach’s drawing is a deep psychological experience that I will never forget.
