A post every day?
– that didn’t work
Making new artwork?
– that didn’t work
Finding inspiration?
– That didn’t work
I know that I started this blog as a new beginning but it hasn’t quite worked out. I’d sort of forgotten about it and I seem to be falling down a rabbit hole and not in a good way (if there is one).
Today I received my degree in the post. I don’t feel good about it to be honest. I don’t want it. That piece of paper is not me and it feels worthless. I got a 2:2 which I am deeply ashamed of. I am a hard working person and I put every ounce of my being into that course and I got a pathetic worthless degree out of it. And now I’m stumped.
What do I do now?
What do I do with a degree that nobody wants?
I did want this degree. Up until the point that the course ended this degree was all that I ever wanted for a long time. Now that I have it I don’t want it, it seems surreal. To want something so much and then to find yourself lost with it.
I’m lost, I’m just as lost as I was when I started this blog. I have no idea what to do. I apply for jobs, any type of job and I get nothing. No one will give me a job. A lot of my best skills are useless. And most depressingly of all i’ve lost any inspiration I one had.
I don’t know what to do.
Hopefully this will change.
ps, I haven’t bought my graduation tickets yet, I think that also says something.
