Ok!
I’ve moved in… not quite lock, stock and barrel, but a boot load of stuff went over this afternoon, and I’m piling up the next lot to take on Tuesday.
It felt weird… my son asked “ooh! can I come?” and after a really loooonnng pause he said “I’ll take that as a no then”. I was thinking, because I didn’t want to seem mean, I didn’t want to say no outright, but that’s how it was. So no, he didn’t come with me.
Maybe some of you will know how I felt. I didn’t know this space. I have never had a studio away from home or college/university before. I don’t know how to be in it. I don’t know how to work in it. So I want to be on my own in it until I know, and I’m confident about the studio owning artist Elena before I let people in. Sounds selfish? Yes! Absolutely! I don’t think I’m going to apologise for it either. Having a studio is totally self indulgent, self obsessed. But I’ve been that anyway. On occasions I have been horribly so. By having this separate space, I am hoping that will stop, or at least be contained. The time just ran away with me… I had three hours there, basically cleaning and moving furniture. My mind raced over what I was going to do and make and listen to and think about. Suddenly, my time was up. I can see me having to set an alarm on my phone.
I have some work on the walls and hanging from the ceiling. I have a quilt and a few books there. I have fabric, thread, paper and basic kit. On Tuesday I will take my ironing board and cutting mat etc. Practical items for making….
But the huge huge luxury is this space with a window and a door. I can let the world in, or shut it out. It is mine only. It has a lock on the door. Part of me feels it will be quite some time before I invite people into it. I anticipate spending lots of time just getting my head straight and sorting the ideas out. I moved the furniture round many times, but decided that if I have a view of a castle, my workspace should be where I can glance up and see it! I envisage moving my thoughts around, until the internal view is clearer too.
Someone posed the question “I wonder if your work will change?”
I wonder…
